dad...

i was always a daddy's girl.  i loved my mom.  but i think every little girl needs the love of her daddy.  and i was no exception.  my dad always worked so hard to provide for me and my mom.  when i was very little he worked a lot.  from fertilizing lawns, to selling cars, and picking up an extra shift or two at the dairy queen or corner store, to owning his own mortgage business.  no matter how late it was i would always wait up until dad made it home so i could give him a hug and kiss and play with him just a little.


and i never doubted how much he loved me.  he was a good dad.  he worked hard for mom and i.  and when jesse came along, he worked hard for him too.  he loved his own dad, and his relationship with his father was the most important of his life, and i know he longed to do the same for his kids that his dad did for him.


as jesse and i got older, dad worked harder, sometimes 80 hours a week or more.  and as we started school mom couldn't always let us wait up for him to get home.  i remember his birthday one year, we had a cake made and presents waiting, all we needed was dad.  mom told us we could stay up.  jesse and devised a plan to surprise him.  we would pretend we were asleep and when he came in mom would send him in to kiss us goodnight.  that is when we would jump up and yell "happy birthday!"  but he must have worked really late that night, even with all the excitement bottled up inside us, we fell asleep waiting for him that night.  when he came in to kiss us goodnight, we were actually asleep... we missed our big surprise.  my mom became a single mom of sorts, dad would be home while we were sleeping, and at work while we were awake.  on fridays dad would pick us up from school.  he wasn't supposed to work on fridays but sometimes did.  he was always home in time to pick us up from school.  we longed for sundays.  sundays dad never worked.  after church we would take long drives in the mountains, or go to the pool, or watch football with dad.  sundays was our day with dad.  i would go back to school and talk about my weekend spent with my dad.  during the week i talked about my days spent with mom.  i remember kids asking me if my parent's were divorced. "no, my dad just works a lot." would be my answer and it would sting a little.  but i knew dad was doing what he needed to do.  he was providing for his family, in the way he knew how.  he missed a lot, school plays, and soccer games, and choir performances.  but we knew he loved us whether he was there or not.  and we knew it killed him to not be able to be there for everything.  he told us so.  he would come home with flowers, or balloons, or a special treat, after our big days and with tears in his eyes tell us how much he wished he could be there, and how proud of us he was.

(notice the suitcases in that picture, all that hard work dad did sometimes paid off.  he would win trips for him and mom to go on.  i don't know for sure, but i think this must be before they left for their trip to mexico.  we were soaking up our last minutes with dad before they left)  my dad may have worked a lot, but we never doubted how much he loved us.  we always knew what a dad was, what a dad should be.  he took every opportunity he had to tell me how proud of me he was, how beautiful i was, how i smart i was.  he told me how i could be anything i wanted to be, do anything i wanted to do.  he taught me to love God and people.  he showed me what being a friend a was.  he made me believe in myself, and strive to be the best i could be.  he loved me enough to give me chores, and lots of rules.  he gave me enough rope to hang myself when i needed it.  he taught me the value of a dollar and how far hard work will get you.  every morning before we left for school, he prayed over us.  he prayed that we would be protected and safe, that we would be light, that we would choose right over wrong, and that our love for God would grow.  i had a daddy that loved me and cared for me and wanted the best for me. he was the best dad a girl could hope and pray for.  

     
and as i grew older, my dad grew a little softer.  he worked less and was home more.  he would take days off to come take my friends and i to lunch when i was in college.  he gave me encouragement and advice when i needed it.  he hugged me and kissed my head every change he got. he still prayed for me everyday.  he watched less sports, and spent more time helping with household chores.  he made it to all of jesse's high school activities.  he turned his love for God and people into a job, leading youth and opening a youth center.  he still works just as hard, working 3 jobs, and sees a fraction of the monetary outcome.  he has become a role model and leader to youth all over his community.  and he loves it.  he is different than he used to be.  he is softer, and more centered, he knows more today who he is and what he was meant for then he knew when i was little... but he is still the same.  he still takes every opportunity he has to tell me i'm beautiful and strong and smart.  he tells me i can be whoever i want to be, and do whatever i want to do.  he prays that i follow God and love others.  and he does the same for asher.



the first time my dad met asher, he cried.  he picked him up, tears in eyes, and told him how much he loved him.  he told him that he can do whatever he wants, be who he wants.  "all i want is for you to love Jesus, asher, that is all that matters."  asher's first introduction to his grandpa was a prayer.  and everyone there smiled with tears in their eyes.  i know that my dad prays for asher every single day.  i know that he will not miss a single important event in his life.  i know that asher has a grandpa that loves him unconditionally, that wants the best for him.  he has a grandpa that will do anything for him, that would die for him.  he has a grandpa that is so excited to see him grow, and doesn't want to miss a moment...

and i have seen my dad soften even more.  become putty in this little boys hands.  he can't stop smiling when he sees him, he wants to hold him and kiss him and talk to him all the time.  he loves him.  and i hope that asher grows up loving his grandpa right back... because asher is so blessed to have him.  we both are.


ps... i started writing this blog this morning, and as i wrote i got a text form my mom.  my dad is passing a kidney stone as i write, so keep him in your prayers today if you think about it... and daddy, we love you and hope you get better soon.

Comments

  1. Anonymous16:11

    Melinda Sue, my father had a kidney stone when I was about your age and his first grandson was about to be born. Your father is in my prayers: God please bless and protect Melinda Sue's father. Be with his medical team and his family at this time. Thanks be to God! Amen

    Also, if you are interested in writing a book you might want to look at: How I Write: Secrets of a Bestselling Author by Janet Evanovich with Ina Yalof. Janet writes the Stephanie Plum mysteries (one of which is currently being made into a movie) and Ina is a creative writing teacher. They provide examples of query letters, websites for publishers etc. And, it is a quick and fun to read book.
    love and prayers, jep

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  2. Karen F.16:49

    what a sweet lovely post. Enjoy your Dad and the wonderful man and now grandpa that he is. Love this last picture of this big strong man with a tiny new life........beautiful.

    (que' lion king music: circle of life.)

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  3. "All I want is for you to love Jesus." There is nothing better in the world. What a wonderful dad you have! Those pictures are priceless!

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  4. This is wonderful and touching Melinda.

    I will never forget his first words to Asher.

    They touched me deeply.

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  5. You are so very lucky.

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  6. Beautiful testimony of a wonderful, tender, God loving Man. Asher and you are indeed very blessed!

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  7. Anonymous09:48

    Praying for your dad and your whole family today. Hope he is feeling better!
    love and prayers,
    jep

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  8. he passed the stone late last night at home. he refused to be admitted to the hospital, after the found it with the ct scan he ran out the door. he is feeling much better, he and mom will be here to babysit later this afternoon! thanks for the prayers!

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  9. Anonymous13:04

    Thanks be to God! Such good news! My father was working on building our first son a baby cradle when he passed his kidney stone. Now 35 years later, at age 85 he gets to see his great-granddaughter sleeping in that very same cradle. Dad's are GREAT! Our best to your father when you see him today. Our Lord Jesus Christ is watching over him for sure!

    love and prayers,
    jep

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  10. This is so heartfelt and honest. Dad did everything he could for me. Even quitting his job so he could home with me through my struggles in school. We are so blessed. Thank you for this.

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