A Glimpse Into My 12th Anniversary

Last night you admitted you forgot our anniversary.  Why wouldn’t I remind you, you wondered.  While I wondered how you could forget.  

 And this morning...

“Happy Anniversary. It feels like we just got married yesterday.”
“Are you serious? It feels like a hundred fucking years ago.”
“Why do you say that?” ...pause... "Will you pop this zit on my back?"

Sometimes marriage is like love in movies.  But not usually.  Usually it is soccer practice, and work schedules, and kids growing out of another season of clothes.  It’s dinner menus, and broken down cars, and the toilet is running again.  Extra adipose tissue, and wrinkled skin, and when was the last time I washed my hair.

The day to day of life with a partner is ordinary, even mundane.  But there are moments.  Moments of grace among the chaos.  Moments of unwavering love and adoration.  Working in the kitchen together; dancing, laughing, creating a delicious meal that those kids we created will never even touch.  A quiet date in the backyard, listening to music, watching the stars, a fire pit smoldering at our feet.  A chest to fall into, a neck to hold onto, when the world is spinning around. 

And fingers to grasp, between our own, every night as we fall asleep.

It may feel like a hundred years, but you are right.  It was also just yesterday. 
Yesterday we made a promise of forever.  To have and to hold.  For better or worse. 
We didn’t yet know what the world would hold.  We didn’t yet know how (easy or) hard it would be.  We didn’t yet know how to love.  But we would learn.

And we will continue to learn.  Everyday, forever.  
With fingers to grasp, between our own, every night as we fall asleep. 


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