cha cha cha changes...

thank you all so much for your words of encouragement and excitement over little baby b. the best part of this journey so far has been sharing it with our loved ones. it seems babies bring nothing but pure joy and excitement to everyone. we will always covet your thoughts and prayers and well wishes, and are so grateful to have you all enjoy in this miracle with us. thank you.

there were lots of things we planned on doing in 2010, and having a baby was not on the list.

our list included things like:

losing the 50 pounds i have gained since i got married. 50, yah that's right, who does that? used to be fat girls, that's who. fat girls turned skinny can always gain the weight back, it's just too easy. i remember a friends quote where monica says she is a fat girl stuck in a skinny girls body. and i guess my inner fat girl just couldn't help it anymore... it had to break free. well, i was working to reverse that. my plans have slightly changed. i instead will be gaining 15-25 pounds of baby weight. great.

we wanted to visit patrick in california. we were going to take the cheapest vacation ever. but we were going to go. for obvious reasons, that is out.

we were watching for our living room furniture we liked to go on sale. we currently have no furniture in our living room. but buying new furniture got put on the back burner. i guess we will be watching for baby room furniture to go on sale instead. thankfully, stephen and holly got new furniture for their basement, and graciously offered to give us their furniture they will no longer be using. they are the best.

we had so much work to do in our yard this spring and summer. it appears that the previous owner had not touched the back yard for the 5 years they lived there. by the time our 128 inches of snow and ice finally melt, and the temperatures warm, i will be quite pregnant. i will do what i can, but matthew may have little help in the yard.

home projects that we were going to put off for a few years, have now been moved up on the priority list. our extra bedroom that has been used as a storage room full of crap i didn't want to go through yet... will have to be organized and cleaned out. we will have to put a baby in that room in september. there are other projects i had wanted a break from, but my plans have changed.

all our plans for this year, and the years following, have changed. i don't handle change well. change and i are not best friends. it makes me anxious, and uneasy, and sick to my stomach. i like to be in control. i like to know. and i have just entered a period of the great unknown, and that unknown will continue as long as we are parents, for the rest of our lives.

our plans didn't include gained baby weight, and lost vacations, and extra work around the house. our plans didn't include missed work, and stretching budgets, and fears and tears.

our plans have changed, i am out of control, i am scared and sick and unsure. but i can not think of any more wonderful way to lose my plans and control. i would trade my plans and control any day, for a bundle of baby joy. my plans and control matter not anymore. all that matters is our biggest dream coming true. and i wouldn't have our 2010 any other way.


  1. Mamie08:48

    The first glimpse of that sweet baby will erase every thought of pounds gained, vacations missed, furniture hoped for, sleep lost...... You'll wonder if you had any life before he/she arrived.

    You think you understand love now, but when you look in your baby's tiny face you will have a brand new reality of what true love is. It will enhance your love for God, your husband, the world around you, because right there in your arms is love manifested. They are so worth it!

    My firstborn will be 40 next month and I still have pounds to lose, furniture that needs to be tossed, vacations we have not taken....and I wouldn't go back and change it if I could.

    Hugs, Melinda!

  2. Melinda, I will help you and Matt in your yard when the weather gets nicer. You've seen my yard, so maybe you won't want to cash in on that offer.

    And once Baby B is born, you and I can go for walks around Lake Zorinsky w/the little one in the stroller. Lord knows I could drop a few LBs myself.

  3. Well...Holly....since you are nearing 200....JKJKJK!!!

    We have a crib and dressing table and drawers that have been in the family for yeasr. If you want your own pretty stuff you can get it...but if you would like our things...they are here.

  4. mamie, i can't wait.

    holly, i was just saying after the baby comes i will walk around the lake everyday... matthew was like, "with who? i'm not going." so that will be great!

    donna, we would love them. i was going to start watching garage sales and craigslist. now... we just have to get up to wisconsin to get them. :)

  5. Just remember, you're not the one that really in control. God is in control.
    Jer. 29:11

    (I'm the same way though, I have my plans and that's how I want it to happen, no deviations from the plans.)

  6. I understand your fears, but its true that once you see that baby's face you won't care about any of the lost plans or work to be done. They change your life very much in every way, but it is so worth it. I can't wait to meet your baby and smell that fresh baby scent. If you need help with anything you let me know and I will help in anyway possible. I love you and Matthew and of course Baby B.

  7. Oh Congratulations, such exciting news! Sometimes there is just a better reason to not do some things and this is one great reason.

  8. gina06:54

    There will always be missed vacations, pounds to lose, and couches to pick up :)

    But there will never be another firstborn baby :)

    Enjoy this special time in your lives...

    Hugs to all of you!

  9. Anonymous21:49

    God is stretching you in many ways....It will all get done! I can't wait for baby b to get here. You will be wonderful parents.- mom


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