where is the love...
my husband is one of the best men i know.
he always was.
when i first met him when i was 19, i thought he was one of the best people i knew.
i have dedicated a hundred blog posts to him in the almost year i have been blogging, about all the reasons i love him. but in case you missed one of those... i will tell you again.
he loves me. he chooses me. no matter the size of my ass, how lazy i am about making dinner, or how many tears i shed for no reason. he loves me.
he loves Jesus. he lives for Him. he sees every place he is as a mission. he makes me want to be a better person (which i fail at, fyi)
he laughs harder at americas funniest home videos than anything else. it is his favorite show on tv. we are always flipping between something else, and afv.
he is a hard worker. he works his hardest at whatever he does, even if it is just doing the dishes.
he lets me dream, even if he doesn't like to...
and as much as we love each other... sometimes being married is hard. we love each other unconditionally, forever, no matter the circumstance, or the day... and still... sometimes it is hard.
somedays we never connect. our lives run in two different directions...
somedays it is like we are talking at each other, not to each other. like our words never quite meet in the air, they just drift off to oblivion.
sometimes we say hurtful things to each other. on accident. on purpose. cause our brains temporarily leave our bodies.
and we fight... occasionally... not often. and usually about something stupid, like me wanting to keep my car outside in the rain so it can get a good cleaning, instead of taking it to the car wash. that may or may not have been a real fight, you can figure it out.
we are two totally different people.
we share few hobbies and interests.
we are complete opposites in many ways.
we have everything that matters in common. we share family values, morals, belief systems. we love God, and people, and music, and food. we like riding bikes, and being outside, and beer.
we make each other laugh.
we don't like to show public displays of affection.
and we would rather spend our time together in our sweats at home, than go to the bar or the movie theater every night.
we more than love each other. we really like each other. we like spending time together. we like falling asleep in each others arms, and waking up next to each other.
we like to laugh together, and travel together, and paint the house together, and work in the yard together. we like the kind of person the other one is.
we know we have faults. he sees me freak out on a daily basis, and i have to pick up socks in every room on a daily basis. but we love each other still, we like each other still.
sometimes life is hard. sometimes we don't know how God will provide. sometimes our lives outside of each other are complicated. sometimes we doubt, and fear, and lose hope.
sometimes it is hard to find that love. it is hard to like each other. we can look at each other like we are complete strangers. we wonder what in the world we were thinking when we agreed to spend the rest of our lives together (these moments are fleeting, very fleeting)
and when those moments come, we pray a little harder, we hold each other a little tighter, and we remember the moments in our lives together that we will treasure forever.
no couple in the history of the world has gone forever without having off days, without wondering, without fighting and being mean. and we are no exception, even in our measly 3 years of marriage, 5 years of being a couple, and 7 years of knowing each other.
no matter what, we are here together. forever. we will always love each other. and in those tiny minuscule moments of doubt inbetween our moments of joy, we will still have our love. we will have our faith, our dedication, our hope of the future. and when it is hard to find the "like" we will find the love.
"It is difficult for some people to accept that love is a choice. This seems to run counter to the generally accepted theory of romantic love which expounds that love is inborn and as such requires no more than to accept it."
Leo F. Basciglia
"Marriage is like life - it is a field of battle, not a bed of roses."
Robert Louis Stevenson
"A successful marriage is an edifice that must be rebuilt every day."
"The curse which lies upon marriage is that too often the individuals are joined in their weakness rather than in their strength /each asking from each other instead of finding pleasure in giving."
Simone de Beauvior