grasping...
New House, Moving Houses Property Magazine, UK, 1935
matthew and i have been starting to house search.
we have met with the realtor 3 times now, and i am already losing sleep.
it seems house hunting is not for the faint of heart, the lazy, or the change resistant.
we are so ready to have a place to call our own, a home, a place we can live and be us.
we want the dream... a home to grow old in, where our kids can grow and learn, where we can have barbecues and dinner parties, where we can dream and live and play. where we can relax and not worry. we don't want to buy a house, we want to buy a home.
we want what is just barely out of our reach...
we are grasping, but unable to reach.
and isn't that just so human, to want what is just out of our grasp...
and it so easy to lose faith, to lose hope.
i am debbie downer.
and i am married to donnie downer. it is a lethal combination.
it is easy to forget who is in control.
it is easy to "if only".
why is it harder to trust, to have faith, to allow yourself to dream, and believe that dream can come true.
why is it easier to turn to the freezer for comfort, than it is to turn Heavenward.
why is it easier to give up and think negatively, than to believe in a God of miracles. a God who made the lame walk and the blind see, who raised the dead, and who can change man's heart.
why can i not have the faith of abraham...
why do i stray so easily...
why am i constantly battling myself...
why am i so... so... human?
"Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time."
Oswald Chambers
"As your faith is strengthened you will find that there is no longer the need to have a sense of control, that things will flow as they will, and that you will flow with them, to your great delight
and benefit."
Emmanuel Teney
"Faith is the conviction that God knows more than we do about this life and He will get us through it."
Max Lucado, He Still Moves Stones
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Jeremiah 29:11; NIV
i believe in a God of miracles, i believe in a God who knows me better than myself, i believe in a God who is in control... and i believe he will take care of us. i believe He has a plan, a future, a hope for us.
now i just have to believe it even in every moment of doubt.
Artist's Garden in Argenteuil
Claude Monet
melinda, whatever house you and matt buy i am sure you will make into a home in no time. i'm excited for you guys to find that illusive, perfect home with no problems. preferrably near us.
ReplyDeleteand if it begins to take too long and you want a break from it for a few months, you can move into our home for awhile and recharge.
If it's any comfort, Paul had all the same struggles. AND he was chained to a burly Roman guy.
ReplyDeleteCan we come and visit?
ReplyDeleteIt is super stressful, but all good things are hard in some way.
You can do it!
donna,
ReplyDeletecome on down...
praying for you right now. longing for a homeplace is a very Godly thing to do... trying to make our own little temporal corner into a reflection of our hopes for eternity... and then you think mortgage, taxes, and inspections, and it can very quickly lose its luster. we bought a house in june - MUCH smaller than we would have necessarily needed, MUCH less inspiring than we thought we wanted.... but the Lord is very quickly making it into our homeplace. He will do the same for you.
ReplyDeleteHouse hunting is a process like having a baby. It takes time, perseverance and steadfastness, if that's a word. We looked for our house for 2 years before we found what we wanted but we had made a list of what we considered essential and worked from that. Then it took 5 years to refurbish it and make it a home.
ReplyDeleteThere is a difference, home vs house. If you think of it that way, how long it takes isnt as important as getting it right.
Only my 2 pennies worth tho.
Deb in Barneveld
I figure faith is like a muscle...the more you work it the stronger it grows. Keep the faith, the house come...Kim
ReplyDeleteHi again! I just left a comment earlier, but when I read this post I could totally relate. My hubby and I just bought our first house and worried for a long time. It was all so new to us, and we struggled between wanting it to be perfect and wanting to go with God's plan. We prayed a lot and our faith was tested. However, God was and is patient and just asks for a faithful heart that always seeks Him first. Now, we are in our first home and loving every minute of it. Good luck and keep praying whenever you feel the temptation of worry. It's the only thing that keeps me (semi) sane! :)
ReplyDelete-Rachel
I am so excited for you. It can be so stressful! I remember when we were looking we had a realtor that gave us GREAT advice. He said, don't let this process stress you out, enjoy it and you will have much more success. So we tried to enjoy it. And we dreamed big. Well, when I say we, I mostly mean me, because I don't think Gary was such a big dreamer, but good things happened! You are looking at such a good time for buyers, right? I hope all of your dreams come true!
ReplyDeletethank you all for your advice and encouragement!
ReplyDelete